Guys, give us a closer look.

A man once told me that one of the deciding factors whether he would continue to pursue a woman to be his life partner is how she behaves during the time of courtship or dating. He added that the way she behaves or responds to him could be the same way she has been responding to her previous encounters of the opposite sex.

WOW! I was absolutely blown off by hurricane Katrina! Do men really judge us this way as a person during the early stage of 'getting-to-know-you'?

Before I continue, I must caution you that my views do not represent any group of females' point of view but  is my sole opinion on the matter.

He has a point. I myself follow a certain type of pattern on how I respond to men while dating although my response would vary depending on my degree of “liking” the guy. Do I see him as a potential friend, boyfriend, partner, or just any other guy to go out for a movie?

The woman in me rebelled at this notion! What if the right man would come into my life at the wrong time? Gals, would you agree with me that women can be quite emotional and dramatic at how we respond to stress, change, and relationships? Am I expected to be at my best all the time?

To the same guy, I would react differently as to how I am from within. Just in case, just-in-case, Mr. Right comes into my life at the time when I am most vulnerable- when I am at my lowest point, when I just lost a family member, broke off with a boyfriend, or put on 10kgs more for some random reasons. In the same way, Mr. Wrong would come into my life when I am at the peak of my career, when I have won Ms. Universe or just had a life-changing-180-degree- turn of positivity. Am I to be judged and say boohoo! Tough luck! Right-love-at-the-wrong-time?

When I am at the lowest point then I would be the most vulnerable person on earth. The slightest sign of attention and care can be in my eyes expression of unconditional love. Therefore I would be a gullible lass and can be a victim of men’s’ innuendoes. Then he will judge me - EASY. In the other way, if I would be in seventh-heaven then a man’s imperfections will be the least of my worries because for me, everything in my sight is bright and happy.

Does this sound familiar? Guy meets girl, guy was perfect, and girl was (at the moment) a disaster. Guy shows attention and care and Girl opens up her life and feelings. Guy thinks she’s easy. Girl was disappointed.

I don’t know. I must admit it is much easier for me to decipher a woman, obviously because we speak the same language. I can easily tell if she is at her best or not. Are men capable of seeing this? How many men out there would actually take a closer look at who we really are as a person and not only on how we respond to dating?

Who says only women are complicated? Who says only women misjudge men? Who says women play with men’s feelings, make them pursue to have the pleasure of turning them down?

Well, who has the answers? I don’t. Though I just shrug my shoulders because I know the best is yet to come!

What was the worst thing you’ve said on a Date?

What was the worst thing that you have said when you were out on a date?

Dating is a whole lot of ball game, they say. Why balls? Are women supposed to juggle them? Ask the guys.

Anyway, I remember at one time – I was asked out by a guy. Very randomly I said yes knowing that the first date was dancing-with-a-lot-of-flirting. It was so much fun!

During the course of the night while we were out standing in the bar, flirting, sipping my rose’ I said to myself, hmmm very boyfriend material. Why? He is cute, has a decent job, tall, and extremely funny. Funny, meaning his jokes actually make sense.

I know most women’s brain activity including myself would be during a date. 2% would just be automated response like “seriously?”, “really?”, “oh, seriously?”, “oh, really?”. We are not dumb beings but these again are automated responses like a recording because the other 98% of our brain is actually fantasizing how it would be like to spend the weekend with him. What will I wear when he will introduce me to his parents? How beautiful would I look on that huge white wedding dress? How many kids are we going to have? And so on… that is if you like the guy.

Many times it has happened to me that I would be a victim of myself thinking out loud. Through the course of our intimate conversations where I am supposed to be the mysterious chased damsel, I blurted out these words, “Would you like to be my boyfriend?” The politeness in him laughed and thought that I was joking. And the idiot in me even made things worse and added, “Seriously, I think you would be the excellent boyfriend material.”

The night went on with our usual flirtations and sexy dancing but obviously we never went out after that. I realized that 5 minutes after I said those words or things of pure stupidity. Blame it on the rose’.

Days passed and I could just not believe why I said that? Though it pays to speak your mind but believe me, NOT ALL THE TIME!

Whoever told you that, we should be ourselves and speak our mind? These are people who have been hurt so many times but not hurt enough to be out there and make the same mistakes again. Or I could be wrong. But of course it would still depend on certain, super-special, out-of-this-world cases.

Dating is a whole lot of ball game, they say. Why balls? Are we supposed to juggle them? Dating is a whole lot of ball game because in games, we need to work on our strategies.

What strategies would that be? I might just as well write them on my next blog. LOLZ

Lies make the world go round.

Lies make the world go round. Lying is NOT BAD! But before you discontinue reading this blog and hit the X button on the top left corner of the screen. Give yourself 2 more minutes and perhaps after that you might just be proud to call yourself a BIG LIAR.

Lies make the world go round and in fact it can be good for you and me! Lie is a type of deception in the form of untruthful statement with the intention to deceive, often with the further intention to maintain a secret or reputation, or to avoid punishment. (Wikipedia)

A lie is a lie is a lie. Right? Yes and No. This passé is not new to you, good lies and bad lies. White lies and Black lies. I will not talk about the lies that hurt and destroy relationships and lives – which we call black lies. But statements which spice up our daily bread and butter called white lies. They spice our lives and make the world go round!

A white lie is not supposed to hurt someone, it is supposed to protect him or her. In even a more personal scale, lying is a way of protecting ourselves. A person who claims that he speaks the truth all the time without fail – is a BIG LIAR! We lie to our boss, our friends, spouses, and children and even to ourselves. And most of the time we are not aware of it! Let me explain and cite examples:

Are any of these statements familiar to you?
• I will call you back. (even if you don’t have the intension of calling)
• I’m really glad to see you. (when you are really not, or it doesn’t matter)
• Which email? Which sms?
• Let’s get together some time. (Another way of saying, Goodbye with style)
• The traffic is extremely terrible today. (when you are late for an appointment)
• I’m great. (but your facial expression Darth Vader)
• How are you today? (even if you really don’t want to know)
• I’m in a meeting right now (when you want to avoid somebody)
• Nothing (when in fact, it is everything!)

Sounds familiar?

These are just words… what makes us untruthful person and separates us from being deceitful are our actions!

I want to be truthful to you in telling you that I AM A LIAR. And more often than not, I use these words everyday, not to hurt people, not to protect others and myself. It makes us feel good when somebody tells us the following (even we know they don’t mean it)

• You are the best in the business
• The food is great
• Your new hairstyle fits you
• You don’t look like your age
• Have you lost weight?
• You are a lucky man / woman
• Your children are really, really smart and cute.


When we hear these little lies, we also lie to ourselves by believing them. We feel nice and if we choose to believe them our spirits are lifted. Though we know that we really haven’t lost weight or our kids are not that smart but we like to listen and believe them. Any harm done? No, in fact it does more good than harm. And in turn, we tend to be nice and say the same little lies to the other person. It keeps marriages and relationships intact.

What if we are not capable of lying?
• When a husband says, I love you even if you are no longer beautiful.
• I think your nose it too big for your face.
• I don’t want to talk to you because I’m busy with something else.
• It’s none of your business (when somebody asks, How are you?)
• I think you gained twice as much since you started going to the gym!

It would destroy relationships, marriages and friendships. And in a much larger scale hurt the society. Imagine if politicians, agencies and governments will bluntly slap the truths in our faces…. It would be a disaster!

These little words, lies, or little chilly spices that we exchange everyday, helps us cope with the challenges and difficulties of everyday life. It wouldn’t be so bad to hear a little bit of lie, would it?

In the morning when I wake up, the very first thing I do is LIE to myself. And what the heck, it does perk me up! I affirm to myself each day that I am beautiful, amazing, happy and successful. And I just go about lying to everyone.

I AM A PROUD LIAR – I help make the world go round.

Are you a Liar?