Counseling: A Ministry Not A Job

My career as a Counselor started way back 1997 when my professor in the graduate school invited me to apply as a University Counselor in one of the biggest universities in Manila. At that time, I just wanted to study because I felt bored in the mundane world of being an office employee. I never thought that I would end up working as a Counselor for twenty years now.

Looking back, I never realized that I would do this job of listening to people’s problems from all walks of life. When I was a high school student, I remember having the patience and perseverance to listen to different stories of people whether sad, happy, funny, and even the most inane story you could ever imagine. As I grow older, I was still caught in situations wherein I have to listen to people. I remember working out in the gym and the instructor ended up telling me his personal stories. With friends, they would usually confide to me their experiences whether good or bad. With all these things that happened in my life, I have come to a realization that GOD has actually prepared me to do a job which I actually see as a ministry.

One of the many inspiring experiences I would never forget was when I volunteered as a Counseling Psychologist in a drug rehabilitation located in the far-flung area of Bulacan in the Philippines. I would remember all the moments I had counseled every single drug dependent in that rehab center. These people who are labeled as addict, evil, rapist, murderer and all other pejorative and degrading words you could think of are now being seen by the society as useless human beings. These kind of people especially now in my country is seen as a menace to society and that all of them deserved to be killed. How I wish that you would have a chance to know and genuinely listen to their stories for you to understand why they do things that they are not supposed to do. In 2 Timothy 3:16-17, “All Scripture is inspired by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, for training in righteousness; so that the man of God may be adequate, equipped for every good work.”

One day my student was crying in deep pain sharing that he was expelled from school due to academic failures. He tried his very best to study well but sadly he was not able to meet the academic standards of his course. Also, I recall the time when my student confessed that her father attempted to sexually molest her. It gave me an indescribable feeling because it was first time in my life to listen to such a story and counsel a young girl who was going through a terrible and despicable experience of her life.

At the end of each day, I would always go to GOD’s chapel to pray and ask for HIS help as I know that I could not do it alone by myself as HE is my only ONE and TRUE Counselor who could help all these broken hearted and helpless people. In Isaiah 9:6 it says, “For a child will be born to us, a son will be given to us; And the government will rest on His shoulders; And His name will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Eternal Father, Prince of Peace.”

Ultimately, I know that I am accountable to my Great Counselor above, whom I strongly believe has given me this ministry and the gift to touch people’s lives and to help them become a person that God wanted them to be through my counseling. It is my hope and prayer that by our personal experiences of GOD’s love and compassion, we may also be moved to counsel people around us who would be in need of help.

May GOD our COUNSELOR and KING be always our source of love, inspiration and wisdom in our humble desire to serve our fellowmen through our chosen ministry. Whatever you do, wherever you may be, there will always be people around you, who might be in need of your help.

May GOD bless your kind and loving heart!

I have CONTROL!

Gluttony (Latin: gula), derived from the Latin gluttire meaning to gulp down or swallow, means over-indulgence and over-consumption of food, drink, or wealth items. In Christianity, it is considered a sin if the excessive desire for food causes it to be withheld from the needy.

I believe that many of us have witnessed, know someone or perhaps you yourself is in this kind of situation whereby you don’t have control over consumption of food, drink or even acquisition of wealth items. Apparently, there is an issue of weak if not lack of control over these things. In psychology, the ego just wanted to feed the desire of the id that the super ego is weak and don’t have control over it. Needless to say, there are underlying reasons for someone to overly indulge himself to these kinds of material things.

The National Association of Anorexia Nervosa and Associated Disorders states that approximately eight million people in the U.S. have anorexia nervosa, bulimia, and related eating disorders. Eight million people represent about three percent (3%) of the total population.  On the other hand, according to WHO, worldwide alcohol causes 1.8 million deaths (3.2% of total) and 58.3 million (4% of total) of Disability-Adjusted Life Years (DALYs). Unintentional injuries alone account for about one third of the 1.8 million deaths, while neuro-psychiatric conditions account for close to 40% of the 58.3 million DALYs. In this regard, the life of many people is in jeopardy as this phenomenon continues to rise.

The great Carl Jung, a Swiss psychiatrist and psychoanalyst who founded analytical psychology was once asked, “What do you think will solve the problem of people who are addicted to drugs and into other forms of addiction?” He replied, “The person has to recognize and be in communion with his Supreme Being for him to be able to control his addiction.”

In Proverbs 23:20-21 warns us, “Do not join those who drink too much wine or gorge themselves on meat, for drunkards and gluttons become poor, and drowsiness clothes them in rags.” Likewise, in Proverbs 28:7 declares, “He who keeps the law is a discerning son, but a companion of gluttons disgraces his father.”

I remember my personal struggle which I shared to my community where I have acquired a lot of shoes, clothes and watches. I am not proud sharing this but I know the reason why I have accumulated such a large amount of these material things. I also remember my counselee telling me that he hates his mother for being to obsess with branded stuff like Louis Vuitton, Prada and the like.

I know that many of us are exposed to all these material things which sometimes separate us from GOD. We cannot control our earthly desire to consume and collect as it gives us a good feeling and sense of pride as a human being. But with GOD, we all know that we can control everything if we truly put our mind, heart and soul into everything that we do. I remember the saying, “In everything you do put GOD first and HE will direct you and crown your efforts with success.”

Let it be our prayer and recite every day, “I have CONTROL because GOD is with me!”

Marcelo: My One and Only Uncle!

Uncle, Tiyo, Tito, Tata are some of the endearing names we call our uncle in the Philippines. But for my family, we call our one and only uncle, Tata Elo or Telo for short. Tata Elo is the first cousin of my Inang (mother) as both their mothers are siblings.

According to my Inang, my uncle lost his parents at a very young age. He lived with his sister for a while but because of personal issues and conflicts my uncle had to leave. Thus, he walked for 5 to 8 hours going to the place of my Inang.  Every time he would share it, he cannot imagine having to survive it and be able to walk for very long hours without eating and drinking at all. Tata Elo would usually share that vivid experience he had which will be forever in his mind.

Since Tata Elo only finished Grade 3, he can only land a job decent enough for him to earn for a living. He worked as a factory worker in a textile company near our residence in Taguig. I can say that he has enjoyed his work as he has showed his love and dedication to his job.

I will never forget the very first movie I have watched at Pinoy Theater in Pasig together with him. It was a very exciting and happy experience for me as it was my first time to be in a movie house. Also, he would bring me together with my youngest brother to a church in San Pedro Laguna, even if he knew that I would vomit because I usually get dizzy from a long travel.

Tata Elo as an uncle played multiple roles in my family. He would be a father and at the same time mother as well. I recall the time when I got sick and he wanted me to drink medicine. It was very difficult for me as he was instructing me to swallow it with a banana. I was crying like a baby while trying very hard to swallow it. When he asked me to put my tongue out, he got very mad because the banana was gone while the medicine was still in my mouth. Whew! That was a hard but loving moment I had with Tata Elo.

As I grew older, it was my chance to show my love, concern and service to him. I will never ever forget the time when I brought him to a public hospital for his eye cataract operation. We commuted going back and forth of the hospital. We have to ride a sidecar going out of the place. The road was like a moon crater flooded with water. The driver lost control of the sidecar and swerved down on the road with muddy water. I was shocked and don’t know what to do as I have to protect his eyes because it was newly operated. I felt very sorry for Tata Elo because I cannot give him the best service at that time.

Every time we would visit his doctor for his eye check-up, he seems to feel good and excited about it as Tata Elo is one person who loves to go out and roam around. Maybe because he was deprived of these opportunities when he was young. I felt good and happy seeing him enjoying every single fun time we spent together. He requested that I bring him to Manila Zoo and Luneta which I did together with my nephews and nieces. We also visited the National library and while we were moving around the museum, I heard a very loud sound like a big stone that fell from a tall building. I was taken aghast to see Tata Elo on the floor like a baby because he fell off from an elevated stage. Thank GOD he was not hurt at all. GOD must really love my Tata Elo very much.

Knowing how he lived a poor and hard life, it was my dream for Telo to ride in an airplane. I would narrate to him how beautiful the blue clouds and the big ocean and all other God and man made creation our eyes could ever see from above.  Finally, the day came when I was blessed to have the means to give him his first experience to fly. I can see the happiness and excitement in his eyes as we got inside the airplane and slowly fly up to the air.  My heart was overwhelmed with joy and gratitude as I finally realized my dream for Tata Elo. We went to the beautiful island of Bohol where we visited century old churches, the majestic Chocolate hills and had our first floating restaurant experience while listening to the angelic voices of the Lomboc children's choir. I never heard and felt my Tata Elo complain during our whole trip and he even said that he wanted to go to Palawan for our next trip.

With all the happy and loving moments I had with Tata Elo, I will try my best to emulate three things that he has shared to me. First, being happy all the time without complain. He has always been very happy and I never heard him complain about his condition in life despite his being single. Second, his unconditional love to serve us especially Inang. He never got tired of serving us until the time he aged. Third, his commitment and dedication to love GOD through his daily mass and praying of the holy rosary as his devotion to the blessed Mother Mary.

Tata Elo, you have shared your life to us and I will never ever forget every single moment I had with you. I am very thankful to GOD for having you in my life as you have influenced and inspired me in many ways. You are my one and only uncle that GOD has given me and for that I felt very blessed.

I know that in GOD’s loving time I will see you again Tata Elo and I can’t wait to hug and kiss you and spend happy moments together and hear you laugh and talk in your “ngongo” way. See you in heaven Telo. Thank you for everything.  

Where Is Your Faith Now?

Faith simply means as confidence or trust in a person. In a human relationship, we can only put our faith and trust in someone we are interested in or experienced good things and kind treatment from that person. If things go wrong, then our faith slowly dwindles up to the point of losing our interest, love, and respect to the person we put our faith and trust in. Sometimes people even lose their sanity and ruin their lives because the faith they have valued, treasured and nurtured for someone they cared for was tarnished, broken or not reciprocated.

From a Christian perspective, faith is an act of trust and of self-abandonment by which people no longer rely on their own strength and policies but commit themselves to the power and guiding word of Him in whom they believe.

According to Lumen Fidei, it categorically states that faith illuminating life means Christ affecting our life and our convictions. Indeed a christification of our life and commitments, convictions and values are called for. It is in this sense, "Faith in Christ brings salvation because in Him our lives become radically open to a love that precedes us, a love that transforms us from within, acting in us and through us." (Cf. Chapter 1, no. 20.) The encyclical is clear: What is communicated in the Church, what is handed down in her living Tradition, is the new light born of an encounter with the true God, a light which touches us at the core of our being and engages our minds, wills and emotions, opening us to relationships lived in communion.

In fact, the heart of the message which Lumen Fidei (The Light of Faith) communicates provides an assurance that both consoles and consolidates the faith community by calling its attention towards a genuine awareness of the gift of faith- who is Christ Jesus Himself.

As it is clearly defined and presented by the Catholic Church, the very core of faith is Christ Jesus himself. He is the ONE and ONLY reason for us to live a faithful life. In the holy mass, we are all called faithful that gather and pray together to declare and affirm our love and devotion to God, our loving and faithful Father.

In reality, faith seems to be a neglected and slowly dying gift instituted by God to humanity. People nowadays are likely to be succumbed to all forms of self-serving and self-fulfilling activities that only gives earthly and temporal pleasures and happiness. A lot of intellectualization and rationalization are consumed by human beings to explain their enormous and selfish desire to things they wanted to do not realizing that they are slowly walking to a path of oblivion. Seemingly, they are putting their faith to the outside world where GOD is out of the equation.

In my life, I have all faith in God that He will always provide and bless me and my family especially in moments of need. I have proven many times that God has always prepared something especial and great for me that I just have to patiently wait and work hard for it.  God has impressed in my heart and in my mind that no matter what happens, His plans for me will always be wonderful. In Jeremiah 29:11 it says,” For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

Now I ask you, “Where is your faith now?”

Are you afraid of JUDGMENT DAY?

Judgment day, Dooms day, End of the World, the Rapture, Armageddon, these are just some of the many terms we associate in the second coming of our LORD Jesus Christ. These words obviously solicit different thoughts and feelings from people. Most of them express their feelings of fear because they think that it is the last day of their lives and death is inevitable. Rarely, I hear people say; “I am excited” or “I am very happy”.  We imagine it as one scary scenario where there is no place for us to go. But why do many people afraid of the Judgment day?

For many Filipinos, singing is not just a hobby but a passion, a way of life. I remember myself at a very young age of four standing on top of a milk can holding a “sipit” (a long wooden object use for hanging clothes) as my microphone while singing the song “May Bagong Silang”. Eventually, I see myself joining singing competitions. I will never forget the first time I participated in a singing contest in my hometown.  When the emcee was about to call my name, my knees were shaking, my tongue was getting dried as if I was choking, I wanted to go to the toilet to pee even if I know I don’t need it and my whole body was feeling weak.  Finally, my name was called. I went up to the stage and belt out my contest piece. It was like the end of the world for me. Now I wonder if I would feel the same way when the judgment day comes.

Losing both my parents in the year 2010 and my uncle in December 2013, were the most painful and depressing moments of my life. I was heartbroken and I felt that it was the end of the world for me because the three most important people I loved and cared so much were gone. I have this feeling that I will never see them again for a very long time and that makes me feel inadequate. 

Judgment Day! Now I feel blessed that there is “Judgment Day”. “Therefore do not pronounce judgment before the time, before the Lord comes, who will bring to light the things now hidden in darkness and will disclose the purposes of the heart. Then each one will receive his commendation from God”. (1 Corinthians 4:5 ESV) I feel blessed because this is the great opportunity for me to be commended by GOD and to see my loved ones again and most especially to be with GOD in heaven. Ate Lily, one of the holiest persons I met in my life who lives in the Philippines said, “We should have the longing in our hearts to see GOD and that will only happen at the end of this life”.

Are you afraid of the Judgment day? I can wholeheartedly say now that I am glad for this day to come. Everyone will have the opportunity to be with their loved ones again and most especially GOD who is the ONE and TRUE reason why we are all trying our best to live a good and humane life.

As we continue to live our life, let us make the most out of every single time we spend with people around us. When the judgment day comes, we can humbly face GOD with anticipation and say, “LORD, I am here your humble servant. I am ready to accept your judgment. I am not afraid because I know that Your will for me is to be with You in heaven”. Amen!

Thy Mercy

It seems that for many Christians we have an understanding that heaven is only for the sinless and holy people. If that is the case, then only few or no one would be able to go to heaven and be with God for eternity.

I remember having a likely intellectual discussion with my friend about God and salvation. I have quantified the basis of God’s discernment for choosing someone to be with Him in heaven. However, my friend said that it is in God’s mercy that we can have eternal life. I was quite upset to hear it because it appears to be unfair for someone who is trying his best to be a good person by avoiding sins and temptations and yet it is possible for a sinful person to be in heaven because of God’s mercy and compassion.

Mercy is defined as love toward those that are miserable, those that are wretched, and those that need some type of help or assistance. Having compassion on those that are in any way hurting is only the first part of having mercy. Doing something about it, is the all important second part.

The Corporal Works of Mercy such as feed the hungry, give drink to the thirsty, clothe the naked, shelter the homeless, comfort the imprisoned, visit the sick, and bury the dead while the Spiritual Works of Mercy like admonish sinners, instruct the uninformed, counsel the doubtful, comfort the sorrowful, be patient with those in error, forgive offenses, and pray for the living and the dead are the ways by which God wanted us to show and share His mercy to our fellowmen.

The story of the two thieves crucified on the cross together with Jesus Christ is a perfect example of God’s mercy and compassion. When God said to Dimas, “Today you shall be with me in paradise,” is apparently a genuine manifestation of God’s great love and mercy to a sinner who at the very moment was blessed by God to be with Him in heaven. Also, when the blessed Pope John Paul II was attempted to be assassinated, he visited the person in the prison cell who tried to kill him and lovingly and mercifully hugged him and forgave him from what he did. It was truly a beautiful expression of God’s loving mercy.

Looking back at the sharing I had with my friend, I realized that God’s love and mercy is infinite and cannot be measured nor be quantified by space and time.  It is endless and unfathomable that not even the greatest theologian in the world can ever comprehend.

It is my ardent hope and prayer that as children of God we can continuously live a life full of mercy and compassion especially to those who need most of it.

The 5^th Beautitude, “Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy.”

P.S. I Love You

Prayer as simply defined by Fr. Thomas Green, SJ in his book Opening to God, is “The opening of our minds to God.” If I may add, prayer is not only opening of our minds to God but at the same time lifting our hearts to Him as well. It is in prayer that we are able to communicate and express our deepest thoughts and feelings to God. It is where we empty both our minds and hearts so that the spirit and love of God may dwell in us. Prayer in its highest form is our way of communing to God for us to think, see, feel and realize what God wanted us to do in our lives. 

Scriptures is one of the several names denoting the inspired writings which make up the Old and New Testament. The bible is a holy book where we can find all the stories about God from His commandments, teachings, miracles, sufferings, persecution and also stories of ordinary people just like us who have witnessed, followed and lived a life according to God’s perfect example.

It is through prayer that we offer and surrender everything to God and it is by reading the scriptures that we are able to get to know and discover our true God. Thus, we can say that prayers and scriptures are ways and means by which we can wholeheartedly fulfill our being of existence. We cannot just pray alone without getting to know who are we really praying for and we cannot just read the scriptures without emulating the life of God by living His holy teachings.

Every time I go to church on a Sunday, I consider it a blessed opportunity to be a part of a community of people that prays to God. As I pray with them, I can feel that there is great joy and love that overflows from each individual which I am very sure God feels very good about.

I remember in one of the books I have read entitled “Embraced by the Light” by Betty J. Eadie, she narrated how she witnessed people pray whereby she described it like a shooting star that goes up to heaven very fast in multitude because of millions of people pray. She said that our prayer can be immediately granted by God because He is bombarded with a lot of prayers. It will surely be an awe inspiring experience to witness how all our prayers go up to heaven being received by God.

On the other hand, one sad reality for many Catholics is that we rarely read the bible or perhaps we don’t read it at all. Maybe this is a reason why many of our fellow Catholics were converted to other faiths because of the lack of knowledge of who God really is in the context of our Catholic faith.  Again, we cannot just pray without reading the Scriptures and we cannot just read the Scriptures without praying at all.

Time and again, we are all invited to get to know God deeply by reading and studying the Holy Scriptures coupled it with our sincere and utmost prayer to God that we may reveal through our words and actions that we really and truly love God above all everything.

P.S. I love you just like in a love letter will be our last but the sweetest words we will utter to God because we truly believe that He is alive as it is the ultimate desire of our heart and soul to be with Him one day in His beautiful place called heaven.

P.S. I LOVE YOU LORD!