Quo Vadis

People seem to be so consumed and preoccupied with work, vanity, sex, money, investments, relationships, and all other self serving desires and caprices available around us. Sometimes I wonder if they have thought that all of these things will go into past. These are just transient and that one day it will all end whether we like it or not. When that time comes, what will happen next?

When I was a child, I thought that life is about eating, playing, praying, sleeping, eating, playing, praying, sleeping, and eating, playing, praying, and sleeping again. Wow! Isn’t that exciting because everything is provided for you and you are free from all stresses and anxieties of life? It was like a never ending fun and frolic experience that I wish has never ended. I remember Inang (mother) would carry me at her back from our stairs just to bring me to our dining table so I can enjoy my meal with my siblings. Also, I vividly recall the time that Amang (father) would sleep beside me and make sure that I am having a good rest because he believes that I will grow faster if I sleep in the afternoon. Who doesn’t want to have this kind of life? It was indeed one of the most unforgettable experiences I will always cherish and treasure forever. If time machine is real, I wish that I can go back to those years of my life.

In life, I have met and talked with people who were confused about their course choice, career plans, gender identity, and spiritual beliefs. From my interaction with them, I have discovered that they just all needed to be cleared of what they really wanted in life, direction. It is definitely not an easy process but they have tried their very best to go to that path of life.

As I grow older and wiser, I have realized that life is not all about eating, playing, praying, and sleeping. I think that life is about finding meaning in everything that you do, otherwise, you are like in a trip to neverland and you don’t know where you are headed. Finding neverland will surely be an esoteric experience one would not want to travel. But where do I really want to go with all of this quest for meaning and pursuit for happiness which I always desire and long for? Honestly, I can intellectualize and spiritualize my answers to this simple but intricate question. Where do I really want to go from here?

Now that I continue to live my life, I need to be clear of what I want to do and where I really want to go. After all, I am the captain of my soul and the angel of my heart. I just hope and pray that at the end of my journey, I hope I was able to go and take the path that will lead me to the direction where I have to be.

Quo vadis! Where do you go from here?